I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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