Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
