yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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