Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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