I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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