Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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