well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i think i scared a bird with my dick
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
