Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
