idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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