some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
where are my eyebrows?
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