For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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