Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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