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• (514): View more from Quebec

  Good luck man

  (1-514): View more from Quebec

  I dont need it. Shes easy.

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.

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• (212): View more from New York

  Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.

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• 

  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  OMG THAT WAS YOU?!

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"

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• (714): View more from California

  The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.

  (310): View more from California

  Best. Text. Ever.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you

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• (425): View more from Washington

  That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.

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