Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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