I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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