We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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