Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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