Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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