So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
