Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
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LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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