I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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