her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
