i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
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