Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Randomize