she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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