I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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