I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Randomize
