OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
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