you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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