do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
