do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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