I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
