At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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