Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Randomize
