Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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