I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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