Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
