No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Please, let me fuck your mom
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize