I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I did not marry a roomba.
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