i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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