good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
