that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
