So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
try to milk me bitch
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
