I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I am midnight drunk by noon
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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