I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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