It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
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Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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