come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize