Michael Bay diarrhea
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
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