Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Best friends brother. Beat that.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
