david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
