I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Dignity is for republicans.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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